I should have guessed from the title that this would be written in the second person, a conceit which generally irritates me to no end. What I couldn’t have known is that it also doesn’t have chapters, which it turns out, also irritates me to no end, especially when I’m not enjoying a book and want a clear way to feel like I’m making progress through it.
The opening sequence begins with “you” finding yourself covered in blood and surrounded by broken glass. Immediately you have to start figuring out exactly how you came to this point. It’s a mystery, where you are the likely suspect.
Only, it’s not really a mystery. It’s a book where a boy pretty much whines about his lot in life. How he’s an unsuccessful hoodie, excluded by the powerful jocks who doesn’t do well in school (but could, if he tried, he just doesn’t care) and takes risks to get a buzz since his parents won’t notice anyway. Other fun moments happen when he’s listening to the girl he likes, but rather than hear anything she’s saying, he’s imagining what things would be like if they dated, especially sexually. And then he has to fake answers to her questions because, as I mentioned, he wasn’t actually listening to her as much as he was fantasizing about her.
So how did I end up choosing this in the first place, since it’s not quite a mystery and I didn’t actually enjoy it? YALSA, that’s how. See, it was a quick pick for reluctant readers which makes me feel like the YALSA people really didn’t get this book. Because a big part of this book is trying to show just how much the author “gets” kids that aren’t successful in school. I don’t know. Maybe outsiders and kids who wear hoodies are reading and saying “whoa, this guy gets me”. But I didn’t get that impression at all. I figured they’d be rolling their eyes, just like I was, at another adult who thought they got it. And then there’s the fact that the book is basically lecturing you that every decision in your life works together to point you down a certain path. Sure, it’s doing it in a slick highly affected package with a fancy shiny twist at the end, but it’s saying the same thing that the main character spends most of the book pissed off about: “Listen up young men! Your choices matter! Make something of yourself. OR ELSE.”
Also of note, reluctant readers are often struggling readers. Not always, but often. You is not straightforward. A high level of inference is required to understand what is going on, otherwise you’re not really getting much out of the book at all. So I’d make sure your reluctant reader is actually a strong reader.
Normally, I would rate a book with this level of sexual content and violence as a teen book, but I’m leaning towards mature teen on this basically because there is absolutely no emotion behind any of the sexual content (nor is there concern) but there is plenty objectification of women. The violence in some cases seems to stem from anger issues (the kind for which one should seek professional help) in the main character.
Sex, Nudity, Dating – A boy clearly likes a girl and thinks about what would have happened if they’d hooked up. Guys comment that a girl is cute but “kinda small in the boob department.” A guy has hooked up with girls, fooled around with them for something to do. Now he wants to kiss a girl and do more, “do it all” with her. A magazine contains an ad for Viagra (but then again so does every pro-sporting event you can possibly watch on television these days). A male character thinks about “screwing” a female character even though his “nuts are frozen solid.” He also thinks about what kind of things she likes to do “sexwise.” A character says that in Romeo and Juliet there are jokes about virgins, hand jobs and erections. He then refers to the work as “porn”. Online “pornos” are discussed. A couple sticks their tongues down each other’s throats. A girl rubs herself agains a guy’s leg every time she sees him. They have been “banging”. People “get busy”. Given the context it is clear that this means they had sex. The main character relates that his parents gave him “the Talk.” He once wrote a report on STDs. A male character jokes to a female character that there are better things she can suck on. She responds with “suggestive comments”. There’s a rumor about a strip poker club. There’s a conversation where we learn that if you tell a girl she’s beautiful that you’ll have her naked and posing for a webcam within the hour. A guy jokes that he can’t afford any more escort-service bills. A girl’s chest is referred to as large and perfect. A character says the the porn filter on his computer is lame and that he’s found his way around it. Evidently there is a topless scene the the Zeffirelli (movie) version of Romeo and Juliet. An older man looks down a teenage girl’s shirt. A girl was shopping at Victoria’s Secret. A teen stares at the pictures of models in their lingerie that are displayed on the store windows. A guy says that a girl “spreads her legs”. He also talks about sluts. He collects a girl’s thong as a souvenir after they have sex twice. A male character has sex with a female character for the sole purpose of annoying another male character.
Profanity – “hell,” “crap,” “ass/asshole,” “arsed,” “Jesus,” The main character admits to cursing “every fifth word” when around his friends. “piss”. In trying to determine whether or not another character is a dork, our narrator first assumes he must be “retarded” which he then switches to “queer”. “Queer” is then used repeatedly. Retarded is used repeatedly as well. “F-U”, “F-bomb”, “screwing with me”, “damn,” “work up the balls to,”
Death, Violence and Gore – He talks about getting the “piss beat out of him” by a senior. This is described in some detail, he’s slammed into a wall, his collar is grabbed and tightened like a noose, he’s backhanded across the ear. His friends suggest how he should have retaliated by kicking him in the nuts or popping him upside the head. A student puts his hand through a bus window (leaving a scar). The official version is that he slipped but it is implied that it was intentional. Later we learn that perhaps he really had wanted to punch a random kid in the face. One guy uses his forearm to pin another against a locker. There’s a rumor about the principal’s car blowing up. A character punches a paper towel dispenser. He seems to have a habit of punching things, other people, windows, his bedroom wall. While it is not explicitly stated, a major character dies.
Drugs, Alcohol and Smoking – Teenagers (freshman? sophomores?) steal beers from the neighbors fridge. Teenagers smoke cigarettes. The main character talks about catching a buzz. Someone wonders if another kid’s parents did drugs. Two characters share a joint. Teenagers drink wine and whiskey. Characters are drunk. A character is known for making good margaritas. A character says he has a “drunken mother.”
Frightening or Intense Things – A character is possibly bulimic and this is treated as a joke.
